Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
