But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
