Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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