You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
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Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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