how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
