He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize