i just wanna soil my oats bro
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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