Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
