After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
