In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
