you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
