Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
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