Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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