you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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