how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
