Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
