I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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