First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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