there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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