You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
