when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
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The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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