HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I understand Curling. That high.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
