Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Blow job season was short but glorious.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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