I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
