ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You're completely useless in the revolution.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
