I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
