Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(205): View more from Alabama

Don't make out with my wife yet

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(423): View more from Tennessee

he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.

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(317): View more from Indiana

you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.

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(530): View more from California

He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(585): View more from New York

any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?

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(303): View more from Colorado

good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

We were destined to go to rehab together

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering

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