Texts From Last Night

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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.

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  (636): Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme. http://tfl.nu/cvtw
  Replies (8) Good night (2959) Bad night (519) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(

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  (925): I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :( http://tfl.nu/pd8d
  Replies (26) Good night (483) Bad night (3546) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?

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  (209): just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto? http://tfl.nu/nvmp
  Replies (22) Good night (1520) Bad night (4666) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.

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  (865): And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly. http://tfl.nu/a3gz
  Replies (21) Good night (5719) Bad night (677) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us

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  (919): CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us http://tfl.nu/dd67
  Replies (80) Good night (3376) Bad night (4526) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.

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  (908): You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream. http://tfl.nu/u0h5
  Replies (52) Good night (4562) Bad night (2714) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?

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  (740): So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot? http://tfl.nu/xzhr
  Replies (16) Good night (4337) Bad night (794) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning

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  (323): I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning http://tfl.nu/dryp
  Replies (22) Good night (5723) Bad night (972) Order T-Shirt
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.

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  (985): My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day. http://tfl.nu/xzll
  Replies (26) Good night (5032) Bad night (2188) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air

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  (410): You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air http://tfl.nu/0wtz
  Replies (0) Good night (1859) Bad night (623) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold

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  (843): Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold http://tfl.nu/201i
  Replies (2) Good night (532) Bad night (1448) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.

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  (832): I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob. http://tfl.nu/r18w
  Replies (5) Good night (1403) Bad night (310) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here

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  (740): She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here http://tfl.nu/x0jk
  Replies (4) Good night (269) Bad night (604) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.

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  (914): Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block. http://tfl.nu/om9a
  Replies (0) Good night (410) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.

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  (720): Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up. http://tfl.nu/96a6
  Replies (8) Good night (1299) Bad night (366)

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