My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
