Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
