Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
