he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
