needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
