I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
