Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
