he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
