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I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
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