Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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