Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
