She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
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Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
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Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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