Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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