so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
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A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
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She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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