I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
i out mim tonsoeep
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
