You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
