i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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