Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
