I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
