you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Found your dick twin last night
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
