You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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