Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
