I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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