after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize